5 Essential Conversations to Start with Your Soon-To-College Student This Summer
At What Comes Next we spend a lot of time thinking about the future. We know that the immediate future for many of you with recent high school grads involves helping them with the transition to the four year college they will be attending in the fall. With so many changes coming you may be wondering what to talk to them about in the weeks you have left with them and where to start those conversations.
Here are five topic ideas to help you get started:
1. The Opportunity That is College
There will be many things to worry about as your child heads off to college…
But put that on hold for a moment and start with a conversation about how college can be a transformative place. Focusing on the possible will help mitigate the anxiety (for you and for them) that comes with major change.
Remind them how the college experience is transformative for many young people because it offers students a unique environment for personal growth and academic exploration. Emphasize that the experiences that students have can challenge them to expand their perspectives, develop critical thinking skills, and gain independence. Do not forget to share that beyond academics, college can be the place where people start lifelong friendships, build networks, and prepare for diverse career paths. Offer the perspective that college can also be a place where young people are empowered to discover their passions, strengths, and potential contributions to society.
2. Safety and Well-being
Start with conversations about what it means to be emotionally and physically safe at school. Include discussions around being aware of their surroundings, navigating peer interactions, healthy romantic relationships, consent, and the use of alcohol and other controlled substances that align with your family’s values. Help them think through what good decision making looks like that supports their safety and help them think through problem solving in a difficult situation. Open communication about these issues ensures your child knows they can turn to you for guidance if needed.
3. Financial Responsibility and Budgeting
College often marks the first time students manage their finances independently. Discuss the basics of budgeting, managing a banking account, the importance of living within means, being ready for unexpected financial emergencies and the potential consequences of credit card debt. If you are supporting your student with spending money, be clear now about what you can afford to give them and how often you can afford it so that they are not surprised later. This is also a great time to talk to them about how a job (on campus or off-campus) can fit into their schedule.
4. Academic Expectations and Getting Help When They Need It
College academics can be challenging, requiring a higher level of self-discipline, self-awareness and organization than in high school. Help your child think through what a realistic schedule looks like their first semester as they are navigating so many transitions—many new students make the mistake of taking too many difficult classes right from the start to prove to themselves that they belong at college. Emphasize the need to ask for help early from their professors when they are struggling and walk them through how to ask. Talk through with them what it means to build a productive relationship with their academic advisor and walk them through how to access tutoring help.
5. Making Connections
Not enough people say it, but sometimes college can feel lonely when you get there. Normalize that it can be tough to navigate new social situations. Talk about ways to avoid feeling isolated. Mention to them that early on it is a good idea to be involved in dorm activities even if they feel forced because they connect you to the people you often see the most.
Discuss the importance of networking with professors, classmates, and alumni. Encourage your child to think through clubs, organizations, and activities that align with their interests. Remind them that building a supportive network can also provide valuable academic, career, and personal growth opportunities.
Conclusion
The transition to college is a significant milestone for both students and parents alike. By having these essential conversations before the semester begins, you can equip your child with the knowledge, skills, and confidence they need to thrive in their new environment. Remember, open dialogue and ongoing support are key ingredients in helping your student navigate this exciting journey toward adulthood.
Reach out to us at What Comes Next if you need help thinking through what these conversations look like in your particular household or if you feel like it would be more impactful for your child to hear this information from someone other than yourself with whom they can build a mentor relationship as they navigate the transition to college.
